Is it smutty to post pictures of one’s X-rays? Why am I blushing? Some people have an Old Soul, but I have an Old Spine, so said the orthopedist I saw yesterday, which is a sentence I now say. HOW OLD ARE YOU, he shouted, the most LA doctor I’ve ever encountered, like he was in a scene from Gray’s Anatomy that never stops. 39, I whispered. 39 YEARS OLD BUT YOUR SPINE LOOKS MUCH OLDER, he announced, checking his stocks, planning his trip to Big Sur, thinking about his smoothie, WOW, WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT. I blushed as he looked at the pictures of the inside of my body, like he was seeing me naked. YEAH, IT’S OLD. There I sat, crunched down, figure four seated stretch, the Spine of a 60 year old, but the self consciousness of a middle schooler, pretzeling herself in an Old Navy dressing room, checking to make sure the door is Locked.