I don’t think I am quite ready yet for a dog, or a baby, or a dogbaby. Case in point: I’m pretty sure that one of my tiny cactuses which only requires WATER ONCE A WEEK AND APATHY TO LIVE is slowly dying, but — when I am ready for a dog — I think I choose a chocolate brown pomeranian. I always assumed I’d want a big ol’ lab dog that one can use as a pillow, that your children can ride around on like a horse, but I’ve met a few of these little guys lately and they have just melted me. They are fluffy and curious and non-yippy. Maybe I’ll even get the dog and a baby at the same time, so I can confuse them, divide love between them, take the kid out to pee, teach the dog the alphabet, force ALL of us into matching sweaters. BE AFRAID, DOG / BABY / DOGBABY! BE VERY AFRAIIIDDDD!