Joe has started learning and saying his ABC’s and 123’s and we are so proud, we barely fit through doors anymore. ONE, TWO, TEN, NINE, he counts, and we’re calling Columbia to see how early he can apply. A-B-C-D-E-F-O, he sings, and we’re making videos so that child neurologists can study him. BYE BYE, C! BYE BYE O! He says to his letters as he leaves for school, and the rest of the day’s work is ruined. We pay teachers to grow his brain while we sit at home, watching videos of him counting, forgetting what actually comes after ten.