Flu Shot: What’s up dummy! How’s it going?

Me: Oh hey! Good, kinda / busy —

Flu Shot: Coo, cool! Do you want me?

Me: Oh! I actually don’t typically get one — I mean, I did last year, but —

Flu Shot: You know I HEAR that, but we are still in a pandemic, and God forbid you get sick and give it to your son.

Me: Yeah…

Flu Shot: Also if we do this, I can likely prevent you from getting sick and being unable to work and take care of your kid.

Me:….Okay. Yeah. Let’s do this!

Flu Shot: For your kid too?

Me: Sure! Yeah.

(Stab.)

Flu Shot: …….BTW THERE IS AN 150 PERCENT CHANCE THAT YOU ARE NOW GOING TO FEEL SICK FOR THE NEXT 24 HOURS AND BE BASICALLY UNABLE TO WORK AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR KID, THUS DEFEATING MOST TO ALL PURPOSES

Me: WAIT —

Flu Shot: JOEISGOINGTOPUKEFORTWODAYS, BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE