If you play your cards exactly and precisely right, by which I mean, with missteps and occasional mistakes, a regular human amount, you May:

• Write a play about elephants, in which an elephant is a character
• Patiently wait 10 years
• Wait for someone to finally give it a big production (THANKS ROGUE MACHINE! | 9.21-10.28 | http://www.roguemachinetheatre.net)
• SUDDENLY AND FINALLY YOU FIND YOURSELF MAKING FRIENDS WITH A BEAUTIFUL LIFE SIZED ELEPHANT PUPPET NAMED HAROLD
• AND IT’S AS IF YOU’VE PLANNED IT (YOU DID)