Accountant: So I’ve finished your first quarterly review…

Me: okay great! So you’ve counted how many quarters I have. I have a lot of quarters. Parking and laundry for DAYZ Y’ALL.

Accountant: ….No. Quarterly. Review. I explained this to you.

Me: Poptarts!

Accountant:…..So, I need to run an additional payroll, you’re about $30,000 behind in taxes.

Me:….What?

Accountant: You owe 30K. In taxes. To the Government.

Me: ….what? WHY?

Accountant: Because of your income bracket and because you are an American.

Me: …But where does that money come from?

Accountant:….your Business Account.

Me: But do I HAVE to pay them?

Accountant:………Yes. You have to pay them.

Me:….So my money is not really my money.

Accountant: Nope.

Silence.

Accountant: You still there?

Me: Tacos!