To Whom it May Concern / Aaron Sorkin:

I’m writing to express my interest in writing for Newsroom, as I just read that you’re firing most of your staff from Season 1. That’s right. I read the news. With fervor, even. I obsess over tragedies and stuff myself with meaningless details. When I wake up to find that a random gunman has randomly killed 14 people, I must immediately know everything and try and make sense of it. That’s what’s really human about the News, which I think you know: attempting to create some sort of order or sense behind illogical and tragic events, not so that we understand why they happened, necessarily, but the order with which they did, because this can, in a weird way, be comforting. So While I am often labeled a quirky writer, or maybe whimsical, or maybe silly, I really feel like I’d offer something specific to the voice of your show: that penchant for late night CNN, that tendency to google victims harder and harder until you find out who they really were. Please note that I also know that you will never read this, and that I would also never actually get this job, but merely FYI, I’m punctual, and I would make and bring muffins and mixtapes.