Mes Yeux

A bit about my eyes: I’ve had contacts since I was 12 years old. I don’t know who would give contacts to a twelve year old, but somebody did. Carelessly and for years, I was too lazy to take my contacts out when I went to sleep. I started to get these bumps under my eyelids but for years, was too ashamed to tell any eye doctor about it.  So you’d think I’d wear my glasses, but I’m so blind that my lenses have to be REAL thick and I have basically no peripheral vision. And then my eyes got worse. And then I had no health insurance and just dealt with expired glasses. And then spring and pollen came extra early and hard this year and I had more eyegasms* than usual. And so today, in one of the first adult moves of my life, I finally and ashamed-ly fessed up to an eye doctor, who examined me and told me I had some disease thing that I can only describe as eye herpes. So, I have that. I also have to wear my glasses for a month, walk into things, and have no depth perception. I’m not quite sure what the moral of this story is, but it has something  to do with not ignoring things and not giving contact lens to twelve year olds.

* Eyegasm: n. when you rub and rub and rub at your eyes like you want them to die. By the time it’s done, you have eye make up all over your face, and it’s questionable whether or not you should be entrusted with taking care of yourself.

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