How to flirt with a Child

I’m DELIGHTED to share that there is a British Boy’s Soccer team staying in the hotel where I’m currently shacked up. I got home last night to find a lobby full of antsy limbs and ADORABLE ACCENTS. And so when I found myself in the elevator with one of them this morning, I couldn’t help but try and make a moment.

Me: What sport do you guys play?

Child (with adorable accent): Football.

Me: THAT IS SO CUTE, DO YOU MEAN SOCCER?

Child: Football.

Me: Please say it one more time.

Child:….Football.

Me: I LOVE YOU, THAT’S AMAZING, DO YOU HAVE A GAME TODAY?

Child nods, terrified.

The elevator opens and the boys runs off of it like it’s on fire, or like I actually am Fire.

Me: HAVE A GREAT GAME JUST LMK IF YOU WANT TO HANG OUT LATER AND SAY WORDS TO ME

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