How to have Big Hair

1.) wash your hair

2.) be annoyed by your hair and genuinely wonder if you should just saw it all off with a kitchen knife but wait isn’t long hair a cultural signifier of femininity and WHY IS THAT and WHO EVEN CARES I’M PLENTY FEMININE I MEAN I HAVE APRONS WITH MY NAME ON THEM, is that femininity? Or just a dusty idea of it? What is it?

3.) Put your wet hair up, decide to answer what femininity is later, and inside of yourself

4.) forget you have hair

5.) hours later, remember you have hair, take hair down

6.) CONGRATS, You have big hair

Steam rollers are also an option / require way less self-reflection

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