I do love to torture myself with things that I can’t control, so I’ve been obsessively checking the extended forecast for the wedding day. It’s part paranoia, part a deep need to worry, and part just a mildly entertaining game. Accuweather predicts a month out, with fun little phrases like ‘plenty of sunshine’ and ‘sometimes storms’ and then ‘Sunny’ and ‘Sunshine’ because there is apparently a difference. All of last week, to my HORROR AND LAUGHTER, the forecast showed basically no rain for the entire month of October EXCEPT FOR THE WEDDING DAY. Only the one day has been plagued with rain. Each day I checked, the rain became more, the cloud hovering over the date heavier and angrier, until yesterday, it became THUNDERSTORMS. This morning, it has been downgraded to ‘considerable cloudiness.’ Basically I want 1.) for there to not be rain on the day, though maybe a thunderstorm would be cool, as long as it’s not the kind that kills people and 2.) to be the person who writes these little weather phrases, arbitrarily moves them over dates, as brides and event planners and people with boats across America hang their hearts and hats on every random word.