Say, have you been hanging out a lot with your delightful and delightfully giant manfriend who has to eat an entire lasagna every three hours or he passes out? Have you been trying to keep up? Have you been taking cobblers and chips straight to the FACE? Hey fattie! You’re not a big dude, you are a DELICATE LADY. Back away from the breakfast burrito and make a smoothie. Coconut milk, greek yogurt, frozen blueberries, agave, kale. TAKE YOUR PUNISHMENT IN THE FORM OF THIS DELICIOUS SMOOTHIE.
BLEND while wondering why your shorts are so tight, while making promises to avoid bread, while day dreaming of mozzarella sticks. Sip from a mason jar until your hip bones re-emerge. ENJOY.