I’d like to take a moment to acknowledge two terrifying, humiliating and hilarious moments that highlight the fact that while I did manage to complete grade, middle, high school, college and grad school, and while I may be creatively and visually intelligent, I’m basically an idiot.
Yesterday, while rehearsing outside, pretty much in a wasp settlement:
ME: There’s something wrong with these wasps. They’re carrying each other around, it’s crazy!
INTELLIGENT COLLABORATOR: …You mean mating?
INTELLIGENT COLLABORATOR: ‘Daddy keeps trying to carry Mommy around!’
ME: I don’t know what sex is.
And then just now, while jogging:
NICE LADY FROM HER CAR: Hey, have you seen a big black dog?
ME: No, sorry!
NICE LADY FROM HER CAR: Okay, thanks!
ME: But if I see him, I’ll tell him you’re looking for him.
NICE LADY FROM HER CAR:…Thank you?
ME (realizing):…. I guess I can’t really do that.
NICE LADY FROM HER CAR: Probably not.