As if

this place could get any more magical, yesterday I happened upon an alpaca farm. You know. Like you do.

I’d also like to take this alpaca-inspired moment to highlight something completely unrelated to alpaca’s, but very much related to weird people I used to date. As Elizabeth Castoria and I can both attest to – at one point, in Grad School, I dated this guy Marcus, who was from Yemen, or so he said, and was an aerospace engineer, or so he said. His response to most anything you could say to him was simply, you know. you do what you do.

His English was not amazing, so we always had trouble communicating, ie, on like 3rd date when he sat me down on a bench by the River and asked, or stated, you are in love with me, yes? No, Marcus. No. He was really sweet though, and I mainly just liked the fact that he was really kind and tall and took me dancing. It managed to last a few months, pretty much up until the point that he invited me to visit him in Westchester and his apartment creepily had no furniture and he baked a whole fish and we sat on cardboard boxes and ate it.  I soon after sat him on a bench, and told him that we must go our separate ways, to which he responded: you know. You do what you do. Yes, Marcus. This is true, that we do what we do.

Now children, if you’re good, I’ll tell you the story of another grad school boyfriend who carried around pizza in his backpack.

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