Sure, there are plenty of things that I do that aren’t the best for me, but I REALLY like to get on my maternal high horse – sometimes vocally, sometimes in my mind – about how drinking soda is bad for you. We never had it in the house growing up, it was a huge treat – so when I got to college I drank generic Sam’s Club soda like water and gained 800 pounds. Since, I faithfully stick to my 3 drinkgroups of water, coffee and liquor. Anything else seems like a waste of calories / time. And so, hypocritically, I judge. Like this morning I saw a woman probably some twenty years my senior leaving a deli with a diet root beer. I wanted to be like LADY. LADY. IT IS 8 AM. YOU DON’T NEED THAT SODA, LADY. GO TO YOUR ROOM, LADY 20 YEARS MY SENIOR.