St. Valentine


In honor of The Day, I give to you the gift of monologue, an excerpt from my new play Le Fou. I’ve been having a grand time re-writing this play, gearing it up its May production at the Atlantic Acting School. I want to believe it is the FINAL installment in what seems to be a triology of plays I have created about women Whining about love somehow, or lack thereof, sort of dramatically.

It takes place in Paris, 1899, on Valentine’s Day, in a cafe in a department store, where women sit and get drunk and write long letters to their illicit lovers. It’s overwritten and fun. To stage, it requires little doily napkin things and big pretty dresses. I hope.

SIMONE (the one woman who Never Leaves; constantly Lamenting Things:)

There is also the death of St. Valentine to Lament. Yes, St. Valentine himself, lamentable, his death. A martyr, jailed and condemned for being a true Christian. Soon after falling in love with the plain, blind face of the jailer’s blind daughter – it is said that he healed her somehow – he was stoned and clubbed to death. Ow, Agape, agape. Love, love, love.
They’re making cards now, in America. Little darling expressions with pink and gold trim. These expressions can be passed between lovers. They hold words inside of them already, so that you do not have to think. You do not have to explain yourself or try to understand the shifts in your mind and your heart – track the changes over the years, understand the patterns your choices have made – these cards say everything already.
Thinking of you.
I loved you once, and I do again.
I find you to be very beautiful.
Would you like a kiss again?
I am sorry I hurt your feelings, I was young.
Come to bed?
I find you to be very soft.

I think that I once had the love of my life person. I think I had him on a string, and he wandered off into the market, or I let him loose and he followed me and I kicked him for doing so. He is tall, or short, and does not dress himself well. He has hay in his hair. If you have seen him, please telephone 001 554 0089. Leave a message with the maid, her name is Sarah. She is very pleasant.

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