That’s right, ladies. The makers of The Bachelor (probably), I’m a Slut and I want to be on TV, and everything bad Ever that is turning little girls into Gold Digging Whores bring you this AWESOME new service. AWESOME.

Start dating a millionaire- TODAY!  www.dateamillionaire.com

Seriously. It exists. I am saddened, and scared.

Fore a mere yourdignity/ whoringyourselfoutforlargepursesmadeoutofpenguinfuzz, you too can meet, date, and woo a millionaire. Just make sure you put out and mention your student loans. Not only will you Date a millionaire, you get a life-long addiction to Norwegian diet pills, a saggy botched boob job, and 17 exotic inbred kittens – FREE!

Alright, ladies! Let’s DO this!