Please tell me you’ve heard about THIS.

Le Wow. On Sunday, August 5th, Airline Steward Sarah Miles took a big hit right in the Gob for all of us girls who Get Drunk at Inopportune moments, and decided to board her flight the Shit Canned, apparently consuming quite a few of those lil’ bottles o Jack. She then proceeded to make ‘terroristic threats’ at her fellow crew members, and was promptly arrested.

I sympathize with Ms. Mill’s need to get sloppy while in flight. Flying being the Worse thing EVERR, I can’t imagine my job being to stay on some shitcraft 9 hours a day with shakings, bitchiness of patrons, talky toddlers and vest-inflation. I’d probably be ‘a-tappin’ that whiskey stash, too.

But – in the defense of the Airline steward – My grandma was one, and this is how she met my grandpa so – if it weren’t for this lamentable position – I would not exist.

In summation – Sarah Miles – I lift my airplanebottleofchardonnay to you – and I think we all should.