Earlier this week, I found myself getting my hair done next to a stunningly beautiful woman, like a woman beautiful not because of makeup, but because of inner life glow, alive eyes, white white teeth …
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there is nothing like a dame
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Have you been taking your Prenatal Vitamins
Kind, well, intentioned doctor: So, have you been taking your Prenatal Vitamins? Me: Are you serious? Doctor:….Yes? (A TRAGIC, TRIUMPHANT SONG OF LES MISERABLES PROPORTIONS BEGINS. I stand on the table, wearing nothing but paper. …
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BOWELS OF THE DARK WEB
Last night, deep in the trashcan of the Internet, I stumbled across this heinous, vile (BEAUTIFUL) thing called Couples Acroyoga, in which COUPLES DO YOGA CRAZY YOGA POSES ON EACH OTHER AND ALSO KISS: Do …
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DREAM LIFE PARTNER
He’s currently looking at pictures of Star Jasmine to train and grow up our pergola, mumbling to himself, Star Jasmine is the shit. Every now and then, and when I least expect it, like perhaps …
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A Bird on the Hand
Yesterday, while surrounded by the comforts of the controlled environment in which I live, I found myself thinking about how rarely I step out of my comfort zone. MAYBE I take risks while writing? PERHAPS? …
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Sadie
Internets, meet my new niece! Sadie Madison Brunstetter, born two weeks ago to my bro Pete and his wife Mary! She entered the world with hair red like our paternal grandmother, Roberta, and INFINITE POWERS. …
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(MISSPELLED) CAKE POSTERS FOREVER
NO BUT REALLY DID YOU THINK I WAS DONE TALKING ABOUT CAKE? *NEVER NOT DONE / DRIVES TO DMV / CHANGES NAME TO CAKE* The Cake is currently backpacking around America like a dang college …
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SPRING INTO BUSINESS
If you and I have a Business Meeting at any point in the next four to five months, please know that I WILL be wearing this and only this uniform, which I assembled in a …
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I am Guilty Of
There’s a thing I do, as a contemporary robot person with robot computer phone brain and human heart, that I would like to stop doing. And so, like most things that I don’t enjoy about …
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SHELF LIFE
SEEKING RECCS FOR SUPPORT GROUPS FOR PPL WHO ARE WAITING FOR THE NEXT PART OF THEIR LIVES TO BEGIN AND SO ARE OBSESSED WITH THEIR OWN BATHROOM CORNER SHELVES IF IT DOES NOT EXIST, WOULD …