When I go for my geriatric morning jog or take my sort of mildly confused not yet awake morning spin class, my brain is in fact NOT playwriting or theorizing or thinking big, morning thoughts. …
-
-
I Admit
-
ENYA FACE, STRESS!
OH HI, are you having a week in which it feels like all things are falling apart, all things body and work and car? May I recommend the Enya Pandora station. This lady is the …
-
Problem / Solution
My car started making an occasional weird squealing rattling sound this weekend when driving to Palm Springs. When it first happened, I calmly placed my hand on the dashboard and stroked it lovingly and sang …
-
All of this is real
‘Coochie Shop,’ or ‘Cuchi Shop,’ to perhaps present a hint of class, is an actual song by an actual recording artist that people actually pay for and dance to, with these actual lyrics: I need …
-
Hi, can I pay you to touch me?
I got my first ever (legit professional) massage today, in the hopes of getting my glute injury worked out. Surely, drunken ex-boyfriends have stabbed at my shoulders before with their hands as they fell asleep, …
-
Two Girls / One Book
OH, YOU HEARD ME. Everyone from NC / who knows someone from NC / with any sort of sense of humor at all / who likes to drink / from NC who likes to drink …
-
OOPS I DID IT AGAIN
I SAID I WOULD WRITE 900 THINGS NOW I DON’T HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO WRITE ALL THE THINGS AND SO I WORRY ABOUT WRITING ALL OF THE THINGS WHICH IN FACT THEN DISTRACTS ME FROM …
-
The Duggars
In the spirit of keeping this space equal parts sandwich, dress and social commentary, let’s talk about the Duggars (The stars of 19 kids and counting, a TLC reality show about the Duggars….who have 19 …
-
Signature?
Everyone has nifty iPhone signatures these days, instead of just the standard ‘sent from my iPhone,’ which lets the recipient know that yes, you are also in the cult and bow daily at the temple …
-
comedy / dream / dream comedy
I dreamt that Louis CK and Tig Notaro were raising a bunch of kids together in a fake house on a sound stage. Flats with no ceilings, hard beds, faucets with no water, things that …